The Allure of Language and Metaphors

I want my life to be art.

This is a concept I have been trying to form words around for a few months now, but it is intangible. Always sitting on the periphery of my vision, no matter which direction or how fast I turn my head. An idea as solid as smoke is justifiably hard to articulate. The notion sneaks in through the daydreams of the life I want to live: a little cottage in the forest, a big piece of land, growing, hunting, gathering. It hides beneath the surface of the waves of random grandma hobbies that I dabble in.

I have realized, making life art—it’s not about making plans, setting resolutions, or manifesting. It’s not about the end goal of where I would like to be. It’s about the creation of life, art, now. It’s about the embodiment of a feeling, many feelings, the right feelings.

I want to be romanced by the moments.

So I will see it. I will accept every glimmer. I will move slowly. Bask in the sun, bathe in the moonlight, walk the beach in the rain, swim naked in the river, scream from the mountains. I will drive the long route and sing loudly in traffic. I will get back on a motorcycle.

I will brew syrups and flavours, putting them in pretty vials that I can pour from, and I will make my morning coffees at home fancier than the ones you get out. I will collect herbs for my evening tea, creating an apothecary that pleases both my eyes and my soul. I will stock a bar and make cocktails, gardening mocktails, and any other beverages that I desire.

I will sit by fires—candles, pits, and bon. I will cook, read, write and exist in moments outside.

I will create romance. I will feel romance.

I want my body to relax into safety.

So I will protect it. I will build the safety that it has been so desperately craving.

I will soothe my nervous system. I will acknowledge the emotions that come and understand their purpose. I will learn to breathe through the hard times and teach my body to trust my choices again.

I will repair my skeletal system. I will embrace rest, finding comfort when I am given no alternative. I will seek understanding that something that can never go back to how it was is not necessarily damaged, just different, and different still holds value.

I will strengthen my muscular system. I will move with thought and build power. I will incorporate dynamic movements into my everyday life.

I will nourish my digestive system. I will fall back in love with cooking, I know I can, since I have done it before. I will epitomize the quote “Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.” —Hippocrates.

I will purify my cardiovascular system. I will relocate my body to places where the air is cleaner, fresher, even if that relocation is temporary. I will lean into my breath, bring awareness to it, and define the pace of my heartbeat in a healthy way.

I will worship my reproductive system. I will seek solace in the life that it has brought into this world, and I will be gentle with the changes that resulted from that.

I will decorate my integumentary system. Since I want my life to be art, I will also be art, because pizzazz is important too.

I will recognize that all these systems are interconnected and that they form the vessel that shelters my soul.

I will create safety. I will feel safety.

I want to be intimate with wisdom.

So I will explore knowledge. I will emulate the wonder of a child, viewing the world through the eyes of curiosity. Never afraid to ask why. I will take courses, participate in workshops and learn new skills.

I will excavate understanding wherever my interest is piqued. Then, in those holes, I will plant seeds and hope to grow stories that I can share, tales that I can tell. I will ask others about their lives and their experiences. I will listen more than I speak, and I will record and preserve whatever is possible.

I will create wisdom. I will feel wisdom.

I want whimsy to dance with me, wearing skirts of softness and grace.

So I will handpick the fabric and sew the pleats together into a design that is beautiful to me. Softness is a matter of perspective, and grace is more valuable when self-created. I will play music that mirrors my moods and allow my body to flow. I will wave ribbons and beat drums in settings as contradictory as outdoor raves and jazz lounges.

I will take pictures of the sky, contemplate the stars, and whisper to the moon. I will watch sunrises and sunsets, and I will chase the aurora.

I will create whimsy. I will feel whimsy.

I want my life to be art.

So I will create it. Gradually. In all of these ways, I will create art. I will paint, draw, write, colour, cut, paste, sew, whatever feels right. I will gather art, bit by bit, and curate this display, a representation of self. Myself. Meaningful or meaningless, it doesn’t matter; it’s for me.

I vow to do all of these things because I will create art. I will feel art. I will be art.